Ahmed Mohamed

 

Courtesy of The Dallas Morning News, David Woo

Ahmed Mohamed is a 14 year old ninth grade student attending MacArthur High School in Irving, Texas. Ahmed was a part of the robotics club in middle school and was in search of something similar in the first few weeks of high school. So in result, he made a clock in 20 minutes in hopes of a conversation starter to find a niche for him in a new school. Ahmed proceeds to show his engineering teacher his creation and got the unexpected response of "That's really nice, I advise you not to show any other teachers." Later in the day the clock's alarm beeped where Ahmed's English teacher complained and so Ahmed brings up his invention explaining it is a clock except his teacher does not believe him. Convinced it's a bomb the teacher took the clock, called the principal who proceeded to contact the police, who's initial reaction was "Yup. That's who I thought it was." and then promptly took Ahmed to a juvenile detention center where he was searched and fingerprinted until a while after where his parents had to pick him up.

    The story does not stop there MacArthur High School and Irving Police Chief Larry Boyd have both released statements concerning the event and let's just say they aren't the greatest responses in the world. My personal favorite section from MacArthur's statement is

"I recommend using this opportunity to talk with your child about the Student Code of Conduct and specifically not bringing items to school that are prohibited. Also this is good time to remind your child how important it is to immediately report any suspicious items and/or suspicious behavior they observe to any school employee so we can address it right away."

     This little snippet from the principal implies that Ahmed was at fault for bringing in the clock to school in the first place, even though everyone already knew it was a clock and Ahmed claimed it was just that. Essentially pushing this idea that Muslim kinds can't express their creativity and try to make it part of their school life. Along with the quote of the Police Chief explaining there was still not enough details proving that the device was a clock and that Ahmed was handcuffed for his own safety neither the school nor the police department want to admit that they were at fault and have yet apologized to Ahmed.

    Thankfully this story blew up and now almost everyone has heard of Ahmed's situation with outpouring support from people like President Obama to Mark Zuckerburg and with the hashtag #IStandWithAhmed trending all day, there seems to be an endless amount of support for Ahmed. All while there seems to be an endless amount of feeling of upset and anger towards the Police department and MacArthur High School. All day on every social media feed, I see celebrities, friends and strangers express their anger towards the obvious Islamophobia presented by the police and school.

Cool clock, Ahmed. Want to bring it to the White House? We should inspire more kids like you to like science. It's what makes America great.

— President Obama (@POTUS) September 16, 2015

You’ve probably seen the story about Ahmed, the 14 year old student in Texas who built a clock and was arrested when he...
Posted by Mark Zuckerberg on Wednesday, September 16, 2015

 

Courtesy of Prajwol/Ru @OfficialPrajwol

    They're not alone in this feeling, I too feel extremely upset and angry. It's upsetting especially since this hits so personally, I'm a dumb young college Muslim American and for this to happen in a country that is praised so highly of it's acceptance of different cultures and known as the melting pot it hurts me when I see this story because Ahmed could be any one of my friends. And for such a traumatic experience to happen at such a young age how else could you make the transition to high school even worse? By getting arrested because you wanted to try to find other nerds to build robots with while wearing your super cool NASA shirt? For all this to happen just because the color of your skin or your own name feels unfair. The real sucker punch for me is that this feeling of Islamophobia isn't new. For every event that showcases Islamphobia, it always seems to have a lasting effect with it about to happen again a few months later. Whether its potentially taking away Ahmed's love for inventing and building machines to something even more drastic like death such as the earlier events this year with the Chapel Hill shooting, or the death of Ahmed Al-Jumaili.

     This is where Ahmed's story really hits me, the whole reason this whole ruckus occurred was because his English teacher didn't trust him enough to believe that it was just a clock and by taking in factors of his skin and name, the drastic jump to the idea of it being a bomb was made. That drastic jump is fueled by the reasoning of Muslims being associated with violence, Islam as a religion of terror all because of very loud vocal minority events that are a true misrepresentation of the faith as a whole.
 
    It becomes even more difficult when all cable news networks primary position on Islam is assuming it as a faith of violence, inequality towards women and essentially anything else negative. Just one example of many is when Reza Aslan, a scholar of religions, went on CNN to comment on Bill Maher's comments on the faith and the exchange between the anchors and him seem unreal. Reza right away has to take the defensive position explaining to the CNN co-host that blaming female genital mutilation on Islam is a false fact since it predates both Islam and is done across multiple African countries with differing religions. He then tries to explain the whole issue with generalization Islam with these specific country examples by listing countries where females are treated equally even to the point where they have been elected as female officials but one of co-hosts goes to interrupts with the statement "Reza, be honest though. For the most part it is not a free and open society for women in those states," If a generalized bigoted statement was done with any other faith that anchor would have been fired immediately! But today it seems like it's the norm for Islam is negative and anything positive out of it is the exception. When in actuality it's the complete opposite! There are over 1.6 billion Muslims in the world and by taking a small group blanketing the rest is a misrepresentation of millions of people. And no matter how many news stories there are, or often it's said this feeling of Islam constantly being on the defense does not feel like it's going away anytime soon. Ahmed was put on the defense right from the beginning, he never claimed his invention was anything else but a clock, but because of his name and skin he had to defend himself, and as any other person describing the invention would with, the statement "it's a clock" wasn't good enough for the teacher or police due to their misconceptions and fear of Islam.

    I love religion, I love my culture, I love how it connects families and friends together creating a community and a sense of somewhere to belong all while promoting peace and love.


    That's the whole reason why I made a silly music video behind the largest Muslim holiday of the year, Eid-Al-Fitr. I wanted to show that hey Muslims are just like everyone else, we love our family, friends, food and having a good time with all of the above. Ahmed's story hurts a lot in a bunch of different ways. It makes me angry that he goes to describe the whole process of being arrested as not feeling human, it makes me disgusted that his teacher assumed negatively of something awesome he made at such a young age, and worse of all it makes me feel depressed that the final comment in the Dallas News piece he vows never to take an invention to school again.

 

    Ahmed Mohamed is the type of kid this country needs. A young minority teenager interested in engineering, a field having large diversity issues in a country that's falling behind in mathematics and science, along attempting to convince the rest of the Muslim world that America isn't anti-Islam with its policies all while having immigrant parents. Ahmed Mohamed is the perfect representation of the average Muslim just trying to do something he loves. Ahmed's father put it best when he says "He [Ahmed] just wants to make good things for mankind"

Courtesy of The Dallas Morning News, Bryant

Read Ahmed Mohamed's full story here: http://www.dallasnews.com/news/community-news/northwest-dallas-county/headlines/20150915-irving-ninth-grader-arrested-after-taking-homemade-clock-to-school.ece

Emotion

    Writing so often about the human experience in a way where everything just feels so EDGY loses its lust fast. Great art is great because it is able to shroud aspects of experience in ways that could be completely ignored and taken as fun light hearted humor. The animated TV show RICK AND MORTY does this EXTREMELY WELL. Touching on social and political topics in a 22 minute animated Television show all while being entertaining and funny to watch is an amazing feat done by the show. My blog isn't great art. It's a dumb college boy trying to write his feelings and emotions so he doesn't feel icky anymore. Do I read my own posts after posting them? NO, OF COURSE. I type all these words and ideas, click post, and am able to sleep easier at night because of it. Is this a larger comment on my own fear of my feelings only being accepted when they are on a public platform with eyes to read while still feeling hypocritical and judgmental when others do it on other platforms? OF COURSE IT IS. But I don't know how to fix this besides just writing more. It's not like I only want to talk about SAD BOIS moments, the last two posts have been about god knows what, and I have a few more in the back burner not quite ready to share either. I'd like to think the posts where I'm not being super emo are the posts where I can feel proud of. Something I'm willing to share and say "hey look this is my opinion on a thing and I think I wrote well! Do you agree?" But those moments only come so often, while it seems 95% of the time I just want to type some words down, get my emotions out of the way and go to bed. Is it because I don't know how to handle my own emotions and writing them here helps me keep them in check or at least ignore them till the next day? OF COURSE, wait I feel like I'm just repeating the same thing now.

    This is the place I'm stuck. I'm so narcissistic that I only feel comfortable talking about other things when I'm in check and the only way to get myself in check is by writing about how I FEEL, or why I FEEL SO EDGY 2DAY. And that's pretty fukin frustrating just because I don't think anyone likes feeling edgy lmao. It's sorta awful and annoying in the way of enjoying anything. You often read artists talk about a dark time in their lives and using those experiences to help them create their what seems often greatest piece of work they've ever done. And here I am lost!!! I'm not an artist!! I think I'm a creative type? Although I'm unsure where or how to express these creative thoughts! And that's what this fuqin blug is for. But is the blug really a solution if this dark feeling keeps coming back?????

WHO KNOWS

whats next dude!!

ur not funny

Instagram changed and I don't like it.

    Instagram is a fun app to scroll through photos done by professionals, celebrities, friends, and family. It had a clean design where all photos were in a square crop and had equal real estate on the screen. This was a constraint but just like how Vine's six second constraint in video allowed for a whole new form of entertainment the square ratio constraint allowed Instagram to have a feed that was organized and well kept. This worked well since Instagram was primarily a social media platform on most smartphones that focused on photos. Each social media platform has it's advantages and disadvantages, but Instagram really shined through it's simple clean cut design. Yes only square photos could be posted but that made the explore page show you all the photos at their full instead something like a cropped thumbnail, and the same applies to any user's profile showing a preview of all their posted photos. But slowly Instagram was changing, some updates for the better and some for the worst. The subtle updates to the explore tab made it easier to see more content, and the addition of video at first felt like a last minute update to go against Vine but with the restriction of 15 second videos it fits the feeling of how Twitter also allows for short videos to be posted. Twitter is for short to the point 140 character thoughts, with maybe pictures and short videos. So with Instagram having at most 15 second videos along with a quick glance with photos doesn't seem ideal but it works.

SO HERE'S THE FUCKING PROBLEM.

    Instagram just introduce an update that may seem minor but throws the whole balance of the social media platform off. The restriction of photos only fitting a 1:1 ratio is gone. Now any photo regardless the ratio can be uploaded and the photo is just adjusted to fit the screen. Taking away this restriction is essentially taking away any fence between lions and zebras resulting in chaos or at least in this case, an ugly feed to scroll through favoring large portrait photos over any landscape ones. With the restriction gone there's no reason to upload a photo in square ratio anymore, it doesn't take up as much real estate as a vertical photo and that just looks better because the lack of white space on the phone screen. With every photo fitting that 1:1 ratio all photos had equal space around them so when scrolling through the feed on any phone regardless of how large it is it felt like it belonged and deserved as much as a glance from the eyes as any other. However now with this new update there is an unfair balance of how much space a photo takes on a screen and that all depends on the ratio it's uploaded as. Here's an example.

    Shown above are three photos, one in a square ratio, one uploaded as a landscape shot, and one uploaded as a full vertical shot. This is essentially the new feed, a mix and match of different ratios from 0-100. The square ratio worked so well because while scrolling through the feed everything felt equal, the only factor to judge on a photo is what the photo was of. Now the chance of getting a glance from scrolling through the feed isn't about the actual photo but rather if the photo was large enough to capture the attention of the user! There's no longer a reason to upload in any other ratio besides the largest vertical one. It would have been fine if that was the restriction for all photos but it isn't. There is essentially no reason to upload a landscape photo. Even if it is an amazing photo the resolution would have to shrink just because 100% of phones focus on the length rather than the height, once again showing why a portrait photo is favored now on Instagram over any other ratio. 

    Is there anything to do against this update? No probably not. Will I continue to use instagram? Yea probably. Will I only post vertical photos now? idk prob fam if it has a higher chance of getting likes hell yea im bout. 

Loss

The world is very scary and it's upsetting to see even after major events of loss, change isn't happening to prevent similar events from happening in the future. From feeling sad, to complete rage and then confusion on the current state of America's gun laws and restrictions today is just another prime example of these emotions. Alison Parker, and Adam Ward were just people doing their jobs with no idea of what was going to happen. This kind of event isn't an exception but has become common today, almost to the point where many feel desensitized from the whole event. And every similar event ends with a very similar reaction and ending, many yelling for some regulation to prevent more of these from happening, many yelling against it, and many graves dug for people whose lives ended much quicker than expected. At this point I don't know what to say or what to do except just ask how much more loss do we have to go through as a community to realize we need some form of change to prevent this type of pain.



Rest in Peace Alison and Adam and my thoughts and prayers go out to your families and friends.

G R I N D

    Another day, another... idk? There's a lot to talk about, my first time viewing Star Wars, my interest in feeling the Bern, or even the struggle of finding a cool tapestry for my room in college but let's save all that for later. Let's talk about the forgettable days.
    The days where nothing exciting or truly memorable happen are the days that aren't appreciated till they are gone forever. The normalcy of waking up everyday and doing a daily routine becomes boring but when really thinking about it, it's all taken for granted. Every small encounter, every stroke of luck, good or bad, is part of that day and that day will never happen again. Sure these events are surely going to happen again but the appreciation factor doesn't really come in until it's gone. That is what is a shame to it all. Trudging through life focusing on the mundane and being upset at it being boring will make it all the more sour when these moments are gone. Life is fleeting, everyone dies, and there's still going to be a world here after you end.
    Yesterday was about change and how difficult it is to adapting to it. Today is about the GRIND and how the appreciation of the GRIND can make it easier to adapt to whatever is happening throughout life. Having a conversation with change and daily mundane routines makes no sense! They're complete opposites! But right now for me I've already approached this thought process that this change has entered the mundane lifestyle, and that's why I have so much angst towards adapting it. I DON'T WANT THIS TO BE MY DAILY ROUTINE I WANT TO CHANGE THIS TO SOMETHING I'M COMFORTABLE WITH. Yesterday I briefly mentioned the fluff that eventually everything works out in the end, and honestly it's easier said than actually believing in it. I don't know what happened today that made me realize that everything will be okay except for that fact that everything today was just okay. There was nothing amazing, there was nothing horrific. It was a just a day.

CHANGE

      Change is a difficult aspect of life that I don't think I do really well with. Well at least BIG CHANGE. Going from a middle school where I knew everyone to a high school where I practically know nobody, and now for it to happen all over again in college, except this time I'm not a punk ass middle school kid but an arrogant lil fuq. Every transition seems to be radically different from the last meaning no matter how well prepared you may think you are, you really have no idea how to handle a big change in your life. The classic gut reaction from me is to be really sad during night and just really angry during the day, all while having a facade of being a clown on the outside (which probably doesn't help much either.)

     Adapting seems to be the most difficult part of the whole process and I really don't like it. It's understandable, nobody likes the rough parts! My life motto is that "Everything works out in the end." but damn man, the middle part fucking suck. Adapting to a whole new environment where you essentially know nobody and everyone you know that was super close to you is now hours away from you hurts. It's difficult to replace a long term relationship with a person you just met for a few weeks. Everyone else seems to do it so easily! How is it possible?!? Are they just lying to themselves?? Is everything just fake?!? I don't know and that's what's so upsetting. It's hard to share tough times too, especially when you have no one close to share it with. I'm angry, most of it probably being unjustified angst from the big transition and I don't know what to do with it all. I don't know how to make friends I truly respect, I don't know how to appreciate myself, and I don't know what to do with all my time and unrestricted freedom.

     There's a lot of change happening and I don't know how to handle it all so right now I'm just flopping like a fish out of water. But hey! Hopefully it does work out because if it doesn't shit idk what I'd do, maybe start a lemonade stand?

yo you know what's fun

pizza, pizza is pretty fun

RELATIONSHIPS

    A lot of life can be defined through relationships. Through these relationships it helps define you as a person. What you like, dislike, your personality, and how you generally live life. Life is filled with experiences you share with other people, experiences you choose to have by yourself without others. Not all relationships are equal either of course. Some a lot more important than others and some completely forgettable. But when really thinking about a relationship with another person regardless of the intensity the whole idea becomes somewhat intimidating. You are a complex person, with a whole backlog of experiences and moments that could probably make at least 10 seasons of a TV show on Netflix, and here you are trying to make a relationship with another person just as complex!

    Without going into too many details, a friend of mine from school just recently got engaged! (Congratulations!!!!) This is a big shock to me mostly because he's my age, and only been with his girlfriend for what seems like a relatively short time to me. With this news I mostly reflected on how I defined my relationships with not just girls but friends in general.

    The main fear I have from any type of a relationship with a person is that I'm not satisfied with myself. How do I become close with this person if I don't know who I am yet. What a dumb young college boi attitude amiright? But the idea that I'm satisfied with who I am as a person, what I know, how I act seems so far away. I'm only 19! What the fuck do I know?? So how do I portray the little I do know right now with another person and be satisfied with that? "Hi my name is Miraj, I like XYZ and I want to share experiences with you, do you want to be friends????" Fill in XYZ with anything! Today it could be vegetables, but tomorrow I could hate vegetables. I'm a young dummy who doesn't know how to balance the constant change in life and sharing it with others on a close personal level, leading me to be afraid to even take risks with sharing how I feel about things now with other people.

    I'm afraid of opening up and I don't know why. I'm afraid of making personal relationships with people because if I can't even understand why I don't like opening up to myself, how do I open up to another stranger! I'm afraid of not being able to tell when I've gotten close enough with another person that they understand where I'm coming from and can help me become a better person. And I'm extremely afraid that the other person won't value me as much as I do them. A LOT OF FEARS AND A WHOLE LOTTA CONFUSION. THIS IS WHY I DON'T HAVE A LOT OF BEST FRIENDS OR A GIRLFRIEND. GUESS THE SOLUTIONS TO THESE FEARS WILL COME THROUGH TIME. TILL THEN TUNE IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF DBZ WHERE I PERFORM A SPIRIT BOMB INTO UR HEARTS goodnite.

take action

take action in this lost world my friends

Learning

     I enjoy watching, and even listening to various forms of medium but I think I am really starting to enjoy reading. For the longest time I consumed 80% of the things I learned through videos. YouTube was my main source for everything but as time went on the allure of a YouTube personality faded and I rarely watch a YouTube video unless it has a unique topic or video featuring a personality I still enjoy. There is something simple to reading that allows for so much more compared to a podcast or a YouTube video that I didn't realize before because of my own laziness. Now don't get me wrong I read some of the books required in school, and everyone essentially reads all day now. Texting, social media feeds, news headlines popping up throughout them it's hard not to read something throughout the day! But what I mean when I say I'm starting to really enjoy reading are the long form articles on topics. I'm no longer just skimming through headlines and scrolling through my Twitter feed but I'm actually sitting down and reading the news. Whether it has to do politics, entertainment, or even a personal narrative of a story that has a on going life theme I'm starting to actually enjoy reading it. Now let's not think I'm a fucking genius over here I'm still too lazy to crack open a book and read that but I think I'm taking baby steps towards it.

      I like to live by the life philosophy of always learning, I know absolutely nothing and it's worth a shot letting the other person share because there's always a possibility I might take away something from them that I couldn't get anywhere else. And I'd be lying if I didn't feel giddy when I finish reading something because I feel like I just learned something new and cool. Will it help in a long term practical lifestyle? Probably not. But it makes me happy and I enjoy it.

     I guess the take away from today is there's a lot of fucking shit in the world and regardless of how it's learned, I'm still learning! Throughout this dumb journey of a blug a small metaphor for going on through my daily life the question of what makes me happy is always a difficult one. But hey! I think I found a small simple answer, I like to learn a lot about everything. JACK OF ALL TRADES MASTER OF NONE. HELLO. Tonight I learned on why Fantastic Four was an awful movie, why No Child Left Behind failed really badly, and how a lot of people are so afraid of dying they spend their ending years "alive" prevents them from having a peaceful death. Now isn't that fucking awesome?

so is everyone gone yet?

     BEEN A WHILE SINCE A POST AM I RIGHT. Went from posting daily for a while to dead silent for almost a whole month, so what happened and more importantly what brings me back??? Well let's ramble a lot.
 
     This blug essentially died, and here I am back at it at the end of summer with school fast approaching around the corner ready to bring it back to life. So why now? Let's rewind a bunch. I guess the reason why I left, was because I really didn't feel comfortable with this blug anymore, even though in the last post I said I was! haha lol lmao. im a moody lil bitch! Who would have thought? I was so focused on how the blug could not do what I wanted from it anymore I just left it out in the cold thinking I did not need it anymore. I'm okay! Why would I need to write out anything I'm feeling on this public platform when I could just keep it within myself. I do not need to share how I'm feeling with anyone, especially on a public blug.
    I guess this is where it leads me to answer the big question then, "what brought me back???" Well a few things just happening all at once I guess. I finally decided to make an Eid al-Fitr video even though its different than what I originally thought it was going to be! (missing out on the voice over, no prayer scene, and it essentially just being a really really really cute music video on how great the holiday is and how "normal" Muslims are in my own small community.) It was super well received! Everyone really enjoyed it and it's almost at 400 views on Facebook! (with a mere 26 on YouTube but who's counting really.) I guess I just needed a little juice of creative flow back in me to want to write again. I know my writing is casual but that is because if I lost that casual feeling all these posts would not really have the voice I wanted behind them. And after nearly a month of not posting at all I realized I do want to express how I'm feeling, I just don't feel comfortable doing it with another person and I guess that's one of my faults. No matter who I share with it never feels substantial. But writing out these posts no matter how chaotic it is, it feels therapeutic. This blug is my pillow to yell in.

      Let's talk about something a little dark for a second, stay with me. Today marks one year since Robin Williams passed away and it doesn't feel nearly as long. I can remember exactly where I was when I read the news. I was in my local Wal-Mart last minute shopping for my dorm where I would be moving in on the 15th terrified of my upcoming first year of college. Usually celebrity deaths don't get to me unless they really do represent something I believe in and I didn't realize Robin Williams fit that until he passed away. When Williams passed away there was nothing but love around him, especially since the way he died. It wasn't a natural cause, it was out of nowhere! Robin Williams was a gamer who named his daughter Zelda after the famous video game franchise, played classic characters meant to be remembered forever and he was able to make anyone laugh and smile. I am jealous of him, of that skill, of who he is and it hurts to learn that he didn't feel good so he decided to take his life away. Suicide is always a rough topic to talk about, people will quickly exclaim "I don't understand why people would do it! It's such a selfish act from such a weak person!" I think that's a hard practical look on the act without considering that the person is a human being. There's a reason why this person is feeling that way and it's important that a conversation is held to help that person! Not to diminish or be completely confused by it, but understanding and willing to help.
    A few days ago it was getting really late, I'm laying in bed and I can't seem to sleep so I'm just drifting off in thoughts and I came to the idea of suicide. It's a very dark place to think in and can be very scary! Don't get me wrong 99% of the time I love living, I love the people around me and I generally enjoy life but for this small moment I had actually convinced myself that hey maybe if I did die right now it wouldn't really matter. How would I do it, how quick could it be done, and does it really matter? For the longest time I'd argue against the whole idea because I live life with the philosophy of making others happy but I had somehow convinced myself at this point that if I did pass away it wouldn't really matter. THAT IS AN AWFUL, TERRIFYING, AND DEPRESSING THOUGHT. Especially since most suicides are often impulsive without any major planning and happen out of nowhere. (10 things I wish people understood about suicide, VOX) It happens to a lot of people! It's not something that just goes away but you learn from and try to live a better life with it. So I tried thinking it out some more and thought if I did it, what's the ripple effect of affecting people closest to me to the farthest, I worked with closest first and thought of my parents. And then swish any idea of suicide just disappeared if something awful like that were to happen their worlds, their hard work, everything they've really work towards in life would be gone, and I'd be the asshole taking it away. I can't be that asshole. I refuse to be. I guess that's why Robin William's death clicked with me so much, here's a guy that seemed to be my end goal, someone beloved by everyone, able to make anyone laugh, a real life cartoon character with his own flaws, and mental problems. So to see him pass away the way he did hurts me a lot. It's arrogant to say it but I see so much of me in him that I feel dead when I remember he's gone.


     And I think that's why I came back here to this silly blog I can't even remember the name of right now. Because this is my own personal place to express what I want. I don't like talking about how I feel with people one on one for some reason and I really don't like when a group of people know about a public platform where I am sharing what I'm thinking but I think the latter is the best choice. I enjoy writing these thoughts even though it may be awfully written. It lets me share the dumb moments of my life like where my tweet got featured on a Buzzfeed article, and the sad where I'm feeling down and I want to share it in hopes of trying to come in balance with all my emotions. Yes I'm loud and always happy in public places because I want to share that feeling with everyone. I'M DA GREATEST HYPE MAN YOU'LL EVER MEET AND DON'T 4GET IT YA FUQ. And yes I can be sad, but I'm OKAY I just want to share it sometimes and get it off my chest. Don't feel offended you're not a special person to me where I can't tell you it one on one, no one is and that's just on me I enjoy writing here regardless of what the topic may be. I love you don't forget that.


**IMPORTANT POST END LINK HEY IF YOU'RE FEELING SAD, AND SUICIDAL THOUGHTS TALK IT OUT WITH SOMEONE SERIOUSLY IT'S NOT BAD THAT YOU'RE FEELING LIKE THIS AND YOU CAN GET HELP**

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ IS A GREAT WEBSITE FOR Y'ALL IN THE STATES AND IS OPEN 24/7 REMEMBER I LOVE YOU AND YOU MATTER

hey how are you?

Hey!

     I haven't fully expressed my thoughts in a very long time so I think it's time to do that. There's going to be a lot of rambling, errors, and just a general stream of conscience, conscious? idk which one it is tbh but ya know just join the train ride with me fam I promise we'll go somewhere fun. (also fuck first person, conjunctions, improper spelling, and all rules, today is a personal day and I'm going to enjoy this vacation)

thots about this whole hoo ha:

    When I first starting to write on a daily basis it was a form of therapy for me. This blog was my digital therapist. A place I could just go and talk about what is on my mind about anything and not feel scared or judged about future repercussions about how I portray myself.  No one was reading it and I felt like my thoughts mattered! A personal offline, or physical diary/journal never really worked for me because there is no way anyone could get any of the ideas I was thinking. Now here I have a blog and I am able to express all I want with no fear of judgement! (Even though random people can still read and judge but who cares about them right?) And now here I am with a dilemma! People want to know what I think! People really like the idea of my blog and me writing! (also side note this applies to YouTube videos as well) So here comes this therapeutic thing for me now becoming an entertainment platform for people I know in real life that I could easily see tomorrow! I know who could be potentially reading and I'm scared of that. I just wanted to have fun and try to EXPRESS MY CREATIVITY and THOTS without having to worry about offending someone or coming off as dumb. I know not all these posts are perfect or everything I do is good but the last thing I ever want is for these ideas to be taken the wrong way and for someone to misunderstand who I am as a person. Or even feel offended that I am talking about this on a 'blug' rather than with them because they are my friend.

    So here I am with this fear of what do I do!! Do I FEED into an audience or do I continue doing my own thing with this fear of social judgement and constriction. I don't know. I just want to be happy and find a place where I can breathe and just be. (mfw this will be first post I share on twitter)

thots about myself and this past week:

    For the past week I've been feeling MOODY and EDGY and it is difficult for me to explain why. Everything felt empty, as if everything lost its value. What a dark thought right? I know! This is why I don't like sharing it. Being depressed or sad around others is not the best thing to do. But hey I saw Inside Out and the one thing that movie really clicked with me was this idea that it is ok being sad. BALANCE IS EVERYTHING. and trying to balance your emotions can be very difficult especially in what may seem personal hard times in your life. Whether it may be something that everyone thinks is very hard like the passing of a loved one or something simple as a change of location. So this is me trying to catch my emotions in check. I'm disgusted that I don't value my relationships with people as much as they do with me. I'm sad that I able to convince myself that these relationships may not be as valuable as I think they are. And I'm angry at myself for trying to fake a happy attitude the whole time because I'm so scared of being sad.

thots about today:

    Hey so today was a very important Islamic holiday known as Eid Al-Fitr and boy oh boy is there a lot to say! First off fuck moon sightings. We know if we are going to see the Moon, we don't have to wait till 10:30 PM to say it's one day just to call back everyone at 12 AM saying it's actually another. It's a ridiculous system and especially shouldn't be prevalent in 2015. I was really excited for Eid this year for the new prospects. This is my first Eid as a GROWN UP CAWLEDGE BOI, I have a car and the whole CLIQUE grew extremely large since last year! Eid is a Muslim's kid Christmas so holy shit let's turn up beetches. But I feel like at this point every Eid essentially feels the same. Everything gets really exciting at prayer where everyone is able to see everyone and then everyone just disperses. It's part of the appeal of the whole day don't get me wrong, this idea of chaos and being flustered to go to everyone's house, to try everyone's food and to try to get money from all the auntie$ and uncle$ yet there is still this weird empty feeling of I wish literally everyone can go from house to house even if they were not friends originally but making new friends! That was the light at the end of the tunnel for me today, being able to connect with new people I've never talked to and become friends. (s'cute)

    It doesn't stop there though, I had this GENIUS idea for a video. Basically the theme of the video would be a day in the life of Eid Al-Fitr with a bunch of clips throughout the day and a dank voice over where I explain especially in light of recent events I'm tired of Islam being on the defense but I rather show the prosperity the religion brings in the sense of community, friends, and family. This was one of those idea that so good in my head I had a script and everything! (And I never plan I just ramble and talk about everything look at this giant a$$ post!) But then I missed key important parts I wanted for the video, more clips of food, everyone praying at the Mosque and other random things. But one more thing also happened today...

thots about muh first CAR CRASH:

    Accidents are never a joking matter. It is very hard to tell someone "I just had an accident" without their face lit up in fear. I'm turning right and some dude rear ends my new car (2015 Honda Civic, if anyone cares I think?) with my mom and sister both in my car, wearing our nice Eid clothes just in hopes of going to another person's house to have a good time. Thankfully after the bump everyone was ok, besides the expected spooked feeling of being hit by a giant white Ford Van and my mom and sister being frantic and terrified of what to do. I did nothing wrong, even the other guy knew it, it was his fault and was very nice about the whole situation. He just cared if we were ok and wanted to make sure everything was good. After waiting for a while for the Police to come we check both cars and it seems as if nothing happened! What a lucky break right? While I was waiting for the Police to come it would be a lie to say I didn't feel down. I was happy that we were all safe, and I understood that even if something happened to the car it would get fixed it's fine, I wasn't even upset of any gossip that might come out of the idea of me getting in a car crash! No, the thing that really affected me was this idea of randomness. Everyone always says "life is unfair" and that "these things happen but hey..." and I guess it never really clicked with me until now. Here I am doing everything right but just through human error and 'bad luck' I get rear ended.

   I would like to think that even through life's darkest moments the light at the end of the tunnel outshines all. Cheesy, cliche, and said to death I know but it's this idea that I sorta need to keep a calm head. EVERYTHING WORKS OUT IN THE END, IF IT'S NOT WORKING OUT IT'S NOT THE END. But here I am now having to go through the whole ordeal of an accident, insurance will go through the roof, and it all happened on Eid and I feel upset. But Miraj no one got hurt! And I'm grateful for that but the whole situation still happened in the first place! But sometimes while in the moment it is difficult to convince yourself that the light really does outshine everything. Time heals all wounds tho and I think to live in a world where only good things happen all the time is actually more scary than a few bad things happening through random causes here and there. Everyone is safe, the car looks perfectly fine and I still am able to believe that everything works out in the end. 

THAT'S ALL FOLKS ENJOY YOUR DAY FUCK THIS WASN'T POSTED ON FRIDAY DAMN IT.

this post is not

feel a lot

think a lot

do a lot

say a lot

write a lot

hate a lot

love a lot

not enough time for a 

clementine

I was going to write a cute post but then clementine made cry so good night

ouch

ow

I HATE MAKING VIDEOS sorta

Let's pull back the curtain a little shall we? I wanted to write Monday-Friday and then post a video every Sunday on a topic concerning one of the posts I wrote. So you may be wondering, where the fuck is this weeks video on Magic Mike, MIRAJ?!?! Well my video editor died. CLASSIC TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES AM I RIGHT. And it makes me really sad for this to happen because I really enjoyed making videos. So the real goal is to have three videos uploaded this week. That's all I really want to share or write about. BYE PUNKHEADS

The Departure of Childhood

    I saw Pixar's latest film Inside Out today and I would be lying if I did not say it really affected me. A children's film focusing on the inner workings of an 11 year old girl, personifying her emotions into an adventure of accepting all of her feelings and her growing up as a person sounds like an impossible task! Yet Pixar found a way to get it all done. I was going to write a review on the movie but I feel like it is a done deal job, go watch the movie. It is a masterpiece and will leave you teary eyed while leaving the theater. Also after writing two movie reviews this week I want to do something different. 

    What I rather write about today is The Departure of Childhood (use post title somewhere in actual post. CHECK!) After coming home from the theater, I could not stop thinking about the moments of being a kid. Those experiences, good and bad, that shape me as a person as I get older. As time passes you learn how complex the world really is, with the places you live and especially the people you are surrounded with. Family, friends, enemies, coworkers, acquaintances, even pets all result in relationships with yourself allowing you to grow and think about how you want to define yourself as a person. Living life as a kid is drastically different than how I live life today. Simply because of the obvious factors, the different time and place, and who I am as a person. I'm smarter, less loud (surprisingly!), and more open to others, to just name a few. But that is not to say I do not completely miss aspects of being a kid.

    The moments of true simplicity really describe the average day as a child. Day by day finding simple ways to entertain myself whether it is television shows with no sense of what good or bad T.V. is, along with simple cheap Wal-Mart toys to pass the time. And here I am today still not happy with a movie that has a deeper meaning within it and expensive video games to burn the whole day. I went through some old home videos of me as a kid and seeing how easily I laughed and entertain myself seems almost impossible to recreate today. And I guess this is where this feeling of nostalgia for my childhood brought me feeling chocked up after watching Inside Out. How can I make myself that happy today??? Everything felt so simple back then and now here I am objectively a better person and I do not have my own feelings in check? Are you kidding me?!?!

   What a dark scary fear right? Until I realize there is something that makes me equally as happy today if not more! People! Getting older results yourself evolving in a myriad of ways but one factor at least for me seems to be the most important constant one. The relationships with other people. Being able to share your life with another person reveals the beauty of life in general. Relationships come and go and through these relationships with so many different people throughout my life I can recall just as many good and bad experiences that help me become the person I am today. What may be gone is this elementary life style but instead is a beautiful complex life able to be shared with others. This does not mean there are no relationships in childhood, those may be the most important ones! They help shape you into your adolescence and then in turn help you become even more of who you want to be as person later in life. And I think with this realization (and maybe late but better than never appreciation) of relationships throughout life helps me answer the question of, "How can I make myself happy today???" By experiencing life with the people I love and love me. Childhood is a phase in life where there seems to be no complexity, you are the most basic representation of you! I do not think childhood ever left but rather as you get older it becomes more difficult to express who you are because you yourself have become more complex through the experiences you make in life. But I also do not think that feeling of simple joy and laughter in life is forever gone. By spending time with important people in my life I am able to simply just be.

DRAGONBALL Z: BATTLE OF GODS 2014 REVIEW

               

Dragonball Z: Battle of Gods is the return of the Dragonball Z universe that fans will love. After a long hiatus of this world after the mixed bag known as Dragonball GT, this film is a must watch for any Dragonball Z fan. Taking place soon after the Buu saga in Dragonball Z the film focuses on meeting between the antagonist(?) Beerus, the God of Destruction, and the Z Fighters. Beerus looking for a rival suited to his power, the mythical Super Saiyan God, and the Z fighters hoping to please him so he does not want to destroy the planet, all while happening during Bulma's birthday party! This film is the perfect blend of humor and action that Dragonball Z is perfect at. Especially after such a long absence of these characters, seeing them interact in this film felt as if no time had passed at all. It is as if the characters know the hidden jokes of each other and are able to play off those. Bulma cracking jokes about Vegeta being sulky, or how everyone can seem to agree even though Goku may be extremely powerful he still is the dumbest of them all, really brings the Z fighters and the audience together as a family. Along with the relationships and dynamics between the Z fighters there is another key component of this film, fighting! Going back rewatching Dragonball Z, it has not aged well in the sense of its visual quality and pacing. This film is the perfect revival of the series because it does both really well in the modern day. The fight scenes throughout the film are absolutely gorgeous with the twist of what seems to be a 3D landscape, watching these fights brought back memories of playing Dragonball Z Budokai Tenkaichi 3 except even prettier! At first skeptical of the return of Dragonball after so many years of it being absent Dragonball Z: Battle of Gods does everything it needs to disproves any fear of this universe and its characters coming back in the modern day. 

9/10

SCALE FOR REFERENCE:

10/MASTERPIECE

9-9.5/Amazing

8-8.5/Great

7-7.5/Good

6-6.5/Mediocre

5-5.5/Average

4-4.5/Bad

3-3.5/Awful

2-2.5/Trash

1-1.5/STR8 TRASH

0-0.5/get the fuck out of here

i

I am very tired. I am awestruck we live in a time where I am able to write this post while pooping. I believe in the future. I believe in the kindness of mankind. I love technology. I am afraid of how it will affect society's social behaviors. I, like most, fear loss and pain. I wish for success and love. I believe this post will make no sense. I love myself. I love you

MAGIC MIKE XXL 2015 REVIEW

          

Magic Mike XXL is an experience that celebrates the human body and sexuality. Without seeing the first film there are no expectations for this one. Yes, this is a film about male strippers primarily focused on them dancing near naked staring Channing Tatum, but this is also a film that is able to use this world to create a mesmerizing experience honoring the peak form of mankind. The film has no real conflict, Mike joins his fellow bro strippers to go perform in a stripper convention because he really has nothing else to do after his girlfriend rejected his marriage proposal. There is no antagonist, no main prize to be won, this is just one last ride for Mike and his friends to do what they love. The film sounds ridiculous on paper and it knows this. Being able to poke fun at its own setup along with being able to really focus on what the primary reason this film was made makes this an enjoyable film for everyone! The primary reason to watch this movie is for the dancing and it will find any excuse for the bois to start flexing, taking off their shirts and bust into their grind, which is a great thing! Without a real conflict the film allows the audience to focus and appreciate these built tanks move around like butterflies on the giant screen. Magic Mike XXL makes male strippers human. In the grander scope the idea feels silly but by allowing the boys to express their performances with hobbies that actually interest them than the stereotypical fire fighter really gives a sense of a journey for these men trying to find "real jobs" after leaving the strip scene. There is also something to be said that the most powerful character in the film is a black woman emceeing the boy's performance! She's in control and empowers the audience in the film by calling them QUEENS! Magic Mike XXL is a fun film honoring what is right with sexuality and the body instead of the often common theme of shame and secrecy in today's world. It is truly a celebration that anyone who appreciates the art of the human body should go watch.

8.5/10


SCALE FOR REFERENCE:
10/Masterpiece
9-9.5/Amazing
8-8.5/Great
7-7.5/Good
6-6.5/Mediocre
5-5.5/Average
4-4.5/Bad
3-3.5/Awful
2-2.5/Trash
1-1.5/STR8 TRASH
0-0.5/get the fuck out of here

I fucking hate everyone

That is all. Good night.

REFLECTIVE THOUGHTS AFTER A WEEK BUT NOT ACTUALLY

FIFTH POST BEST POST. Four posts later here is the fifth, and this territory still feels unknown. There are no real standards, except those set by me. This here is the problem. The vague idea of what this blug is meant to be. The debate of whether this blug should be formal or casual. After writing for four days, (three really) the casual approach seems to be the best. WHO DOESN'T LIKE SOME GOOD JOKES AND CONJUNCTIONS? But there still is this desire to write something serious where the message is genuinely important. These posts will require dedication, time, and need to be really well thought out, which means they will be rare! This blug helps a lot, it has only been a few days but it gives this drive to want to get better. I want to learn how to create a better website, write better, and learn a lot more about everything! This blug gives me a sense of motivation to do it. No one may be reading it, but I am and I think I am okay with that for now. Beginning posts are always awful. By actively working here and trying to express myself creatively I finally found something that fills up the empty feeling I have. Hopefully this does not die but continues to evolve into something really cool. Come back here Monday!


OHHHH FAM YOU THOUGHT I WAS DONE NAH COME BACK HERE SUNDAY WE DOIN VIDEOS, TILL THEN ENJOY MY BOY DOIN THE WHIP

I am very very very excited for Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

Today Entertainment Weekly for their giant Comic-Con (a big nerd convention for movies, tv, and comics) issue released seven exclusive pictures of the upcoming Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice film releasing in March 2016 by director Zack Snyder. By the title of this post it is obvious I am very excited for this movie because of these photos. Even though I promised myself I would not get excited about any news about this movie. But hey there are some new pics and I wanna write some thoughts about them so LET ME BE A NERD MOM.

PIC 1:

Here is the Entertainment Weekly cover featuring the famous DC Trinity. It is a dream come true seeing these three gods coming to life on the big screen and this cover just emphasizes this. Although Batman (Ben Affleck) does looks awkward here. Fan reaction to Batman has been mixed with initial reactions of pure rage to a wait and see approach. People are too quick to hate on it though, Batman seems to feel so awkward here is because he is in a bright area! Just look at that white background fam! Batman does not work in the day, just think about the infmous Dark Knight Rises scene where he is fighting Bane in broad daylight and it looks completely silly. Batman is a hero meant for the darkness where he is supposed to stay, there has been multiple pics and moments Batfleck is shown in action and he looks great! This is because he is where he's supposed to be shown, Bruce Wayne for the day, Batman at night. Moving on to Wonder Woman, (Gal Gadot) this seems to be a almost perfect portrayal for the film! The colors seem to be a bit brighter than what was initially shown but again that might be for the case of this cover, too early to call for her. (But hey I wouldn't mind if the colors stayed or even got brighter! Colors are fun!!!) Lastly we got the standard Superman (Henry Cavil) looking very similar to what he looked like in Man of Steel. The ideal situation would be to brighten up the color on his costume even more but for the tone the film is going in, the costume will probably stay the same or get even darker. 

PIC 2:

For the second photo we have a beautiful shot between Batman's suit inspired by The Dark Knight Returns graphic novel. There is not much to say about this shot other than it looks very pretty, which is expected by Snyder. This is one of those photos though that brings back excited feelings of moments where Batman and Superman do face off like in The Dark Knight Returns.

PIC 3:

Here we have Bruce Wayne (Ben Affleck) and Diana Prince (Gal Gadot). Ben Affleck had this to say about the photo, "I love the fact that there was this Thomas Crowne Affair, Bond-y sexy scene that they wrote about two people who are pretending to be two different people who each know the secrets of the other person,” This calls back to memories of the romantic subplot introduced in the animated Justice League universe. (To the point where there was an exact scene just like this one!)

Seeing Bruce Wayne/Batman and Diana Prince/Wonder woman flirt into a romantic relationship is probably the closest thing to a beautiful relationship I will get to and I think I am ok with that.

PIC 4:

“I like to think that Man of Steel was the perspective of the world from Clark, Kal-El, looking at the world and trying to exist with in it, Batman v Superman is definitely more mankind’s perspective of Superman.” explains Cavill with this picture, and it seems like so especially with the trailer released a couple months ago. Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice is a movie where the Man of Steel must face repercussions of the damage that happened at the end of the previous film. The debate of whether Superman is the savior the planet needs, or the monster sent to destroy is what seems to be the key theme for this film. Batman assuming to believe the latter leading to the whole "versus" concept. This photo seems to give that feeling that Superman is the savior of humanity, this idea that he is these people's god on Earth to protect them from evils.

PIC 5:

This is a scene from the trailer, where Batman is on the ground looking up to Superman. Not much to say about this photo except this really pushes the idea of Batman is meant to be in a dark place, He may be wearing a different suit for it but that does not take away how awesome he looks! Batman looks angry and ready to fight, especially with this dark dreary rain.

PIC 6:

MY BOY LEX IN THE HOUSE. At first it's strange to see Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg) with golden locks of hair but he has already been shown with the cue ball head already, so what this photo does is hint at seeing the Lex before and after he becomes hell bent on destroying Superman. There are a lot of ways it can go but my prediction is Lex does not trust Superman at all believing that humanity should be saved by humanity and not this alien god like being. "He's not one of us!" Through this desire of trying to shut down and expel Superman he loses hair because he gets really stressed out. lmao. But in seriousness it is interesting to think about how Lex will fit in this film because it has clear hints of inspirations from The Dark Knight Returns, but Lex Luthor was not even in that story!

PIC 7: 

The last scene does not reveal much but the hunk Ben Affleck talking with the stud Zack Snyder. So I guess that gives me the perfect opportunity to discuss what how I feel about this upcoming film!

AM I EXCITED FOR BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE?! YES! I THINK! MAYBE! IDK!

But Miraj you just said in the post title you are excited what do you mean?!?! Well lets break it down. I love the DC universe, I connect with these heroes in a way that genuinely make me happy. These are gods that represent the ideals, and are used to tell amazing stories of pain, loss, success, and hope! My favorite superhero of all time being the Man of Steel himself! My reaction to Man of Steel was mixed. It was a okay film. It really did not feel like a Superman movie but rather some necessary dark gritty reboot of Superman to match the Christopher Nolan's Dark Knight Trilogy. So with the original announcement of Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice, I was indifferent, and as news starting to poor in about more and more characters are being introduced in this film such as Wonder woman, Aquaman, Lex Luthor, Cyborg, and who knows who else, I accepted this movie will be HOT TRASH. But there is just something that gets my gut seeing photos of these characters coming to life and in action. Zack Snyder is known to be a mixed bag when it comes to movies. He always seems to have the best trailers, and most beautiful shots but when it comes to the overall package it is mixed. Yet here I am again getting hyped for this movie that is still a little less than a year out praying for another trailer at Comic Con next week because of my special relationship with the DC Universe. Superman represents everything good, ideal and hope to me so like everything guess I have to just have hope that everything works out in the end and this film will be amazing.

Apple Music Day 1

APPLE MUZACK

Updates and change can always bring out fear. Especially when that change almost seems to drastically overhaul the whole structure within one swoop instead of smaller transitions. This does not mean it is a bad thing just a little scary. My initial thought on Apple's Apple Music service roll out is a sigh of annoyance. "Another music streaming service?!?" I download my music, and stream off Spotify on my laptop when I don't feel like downloading a popular single or just in a mood to hear a random song. I'm not a heavy music guy but I have my fair share of favorite artists, and albums. So what's the point of shoving this whole new system on me? But there is no way to avoid this update so might as well try to understand it. It has only been a day and there is a three month free trial for the service so the plan is to come back three months later and write final thoughts on the service. But here are some initial thoughts, annoyances and questions.

The Interface is pretty...

This update completely changes the Music app to be gorgeous! Colors are never a bad thing when done right and is easily shown here. Gone is the old standard white background, white pink text for all albums and here is a new tinted background matching extremely well with the album art. Just look at the before and after of Chance the Rapper's 10 Day album! Looks so FRE$H and KLEAN.

Before:

After:

But feels cluttered

The listing of songs is not perfect though, the addition of a giant RECENTLY ADDED section gives this cluttered feeling minimizing the most important aspect of the music app. The list of your music. Whether organized by artist, playlist, or genre the albums in my case are much smaller and lose giant amount of real estate because of three recently added albums on top. I know what I recently added, I do not need it to take up all that space. This seems like such a minor complaint but it is frustrating when the ability to see a bunch of beautiful album art in a list gone to a smaller pixel-esque form because of an addition of a RECENTLY ADDED section

Apple Music shows promise

The real meat and bones of this update is the introduction of Apple Music, Apple's product to face the monster known as Spotify and the puppy known as Tidal. Is Apple Music good? Really too early to call, it was just released but it does show great promise. It is not perfect out the gate, leaving questions like how exactly does my already downloaded music library upload to the new cloud library, and how to add albums off of Apple Music to the cloud library so it can be playable for offline use so my data usage is not through the roof. These are simple questions but answers seem hard to find. To Apple's defense though it has only been a day and I have not really messed around with the service completely yet. However the idea does really grab my attention. I hate having extra apps on my phone, I was ecstatic when iTunes radio was introduced because that meant goodbye to Pandora, and secretly I never want to download Spotify to have another music app on my phone. Now here comes this Apple service that essentially matches Spotify and may beat it in certain aspects like the music library and quality of the music streaming and it has me intrigued. The idea that my music app will not take up gigabytes of storage on my phone but mere megabytes because my music library is in the cloud seems fantastic! The last aspect and probably the coolest  is Apple's ability to curate music. Being able to curate and introduce new music to you based on songs you have "hearted" (if that's a verb?) including your already downloaded library seems perfect and they have my girl Taylor Swift in their library (just shake it off Spotify) Plus it looks super pretty!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who doesn't want to listen to something called OLD SCHOOL BBQ???

2EAGER 2EARLY

To say I am not excited to at least try Apple Music is a lie, even with it's strange interface choices (seriously Apple I can't make My Music section first instead of the For You section?), and confusing uploading process to the Cloud Library I am very excited to see how the next three months hold for Apple MUZACK.

No Idea

    I have no idea what I'm doing. What is the proper formatting? Should I use first person? How do semi-colons work? Should that even be hyphenated? It's past midnight on the East Coast does that still make this a daily thing? Is East Coast a proper noun? What should I even write about? Where were all my ideas that I had yesterday? Shit.
   
    The original goal of this "blug" is to have a place where I can write my thoughts about anything on a daily basis. I would like to think that I have shareable thoughts on a daily basis and by writing them daily I, myself would get better at writing them allowing myself to easily share them with others in hopes of evolving them or changing someone else's perspective. The biggest frustration as a person is the urge to convey an opinion or idea and the other person either does not understand, or understands a completely different idea than the original.

    So here is my second post and I have no idea want to say. Before I had ideas but no platform to express them, and now here I am with a platform to express them but no ideas to express! Of course it is impossible to write a thought provoking, funny, meaningful post every night but to not even have anything to talk about the second night is bit of a punch to the morale. But hey its only the second post, maybe it will get better from here.

BREAKING NEWS: Answers to the questions up top:

my first post

this is my first post, it is a garbage post so it can't get any worse than this. so join this wild ride where the destination is funtopia a land where hate loves to love and love loves to hate. I think.